[the Writing of Kuypers][JanetKuypers.com][Bio][Poems][Prose]


that we wish 2005

Started 09/17/98, converted to prose 09-28/05

There are so many times I wish I had that — well, that wish to not by judged against everyone else when they had more than you from the start, well, that wish to have a fair start to get here. All my life I have had the high school high and all of the other useless dronings like the high school proms, and I’ve always thought I was good enough for that. It was at those times when someone would remind me that I might be wrong because that’s then someone else would always come along and cover me with their better hair and their better clothes and their better friends and their better social circles and their parents that let them do whatever they wanted when they were young and their pulitzer prizes.
Wow. I must really heat all people with what just sort of naturally came out of me like that.
But you know what I mean, that some people always seemed to have the better cars with the nice red stripe, or maybe it was better shoes or better clothes or a better boyfriend. Well, you get what I’m talking about, even if you’ve never directly experienced it or anything. I mean, doesn’t it just suck how sometimes people can be the biggest jerks in their day to day life to people they don’t even know and haven’t even met before? I mean, isn’t it funny how people can sometimes be jerks, and invariably they are the ones who always end up with the money from the parents or they get married to people who have money right out of high school and most of their life is spent in this plush life of heaven?
And then there’s someone like you or me, someone who has always tried to do good and always done the best they could to help other people, and sometime there’s a person like you or me, but you know, sometimes the average type of person tries to do real good every day, but they never have enough money or they never have the right clothes or the right kind of car. And that list of what-ifs could probably go on and on, but I think you get the idea.
I mean, did some person’s parents have bas luck with the stocks, or did somebody think they were doing the right thing for their family but just had to deal with a bad flood, or a devastating hurricane, or other bad weather conditions? I guess some people just have a run of bad luck and there is one kid who tries to make it all better but just can’t quite do it.
I don’t know what anyone’s reason could be for misreading the news of the future about how computer industry will make a lot of money for the next thirty years. I guess all of us are faced with choices all of out lives, and it’s only the combination of all the right choice and all the right decisions that makes a difference in anyone’s good or bad outcome.
I don’t know, maybe it’s just how you were raised will show what you look at and what you need and what you want and how much you’re willing to spend for it that makes all the difference. So who is dropping the ball of all the people who think they have it good, so they have the right to treat others like garbage? Who gave them the right?

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Chicago poet Janet Kuypers
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