[the Writing of Kuypers][JanetKuypers.com][Bio][Poems][Prose]


Someone Give Me the Answers 2005

started 09/07/98, converted to prose 09/27/05

I don’t think I can respect people. Can anyone give me the answers? I’ve been looking and looking, and none of the solutions are coming to me.
Have I been taught to be so different from the rest of the world? Maybe I have been. Maybe I’m the one with the different answers, and maybe I don’t know where to begin. And maybe no one can help me through this.
My dictionary is older than my schooling, and my encyclopedia set is older than I am.
I’ve been looking for answers to what I thought were simple questions and the people who are supposed to be smarter than I am never have the answers for me.
I’ve talked to a lot of people in my lifetime, and with each day that passes I lose more respect for the people I’ve known.
This doesn’t seem like a fair thing for me to admit.
Maybe I’ve just had some bad breaks I don’t know what my excuses are, or what my reasons are--but the problem is that I don’t think anyone has a reason for the majority of the actions they engage in.
Or should I say commit instead of engage in
When I’ve been injured, I try to recover, but right now I can’t even finish a sentence. And I’m expecting finished sentences and sense and answers from all of the people I’ve already lost so much faith in.

I was recently in the hospital for 6 weeks. When I regained consciousness, I was given the same meal three times a day. Most every day I slept in the hospital, I was physically strapped to my bed so that I would stay in my bed all night
As far as I know, this was not an uncommon occurrance for my treatment I don’t know how anyone else was treated, but I am guessing I was one of at least 20 patients in the same institution, in the same ward,with the same teachers.

Sometimes the answers don’t come easy. The answers haven’t come to me for quite a while, not since my accident, or since my hospital visits. Not since most of my school days or since a lot of my friendships.
I don’t know where the answers are. I don’t know where my answers were. I’ll try to find the answers one day, and if anyone can help me, let me know.

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